“And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of His glory in Christ Jesus.”   (Philippians 4:19 NIV)  Leaving the funeral of my closest friend’s mother, I could only think of how precious and short this life is, and how much I love my sons, Rory and Ian.  In my pocket was a 30% off coupon for the Christian book store, a $25 gift card, and today was the day to pick up our pre-purchased copy of the movie “Courageous,” -  a new movie about stepping up to be the kind of father scripture defines.  So, why not bless Rory and Ian with a small gift today “just because,” I thought.  The Tim Tebow book I knew Ian had been eyeing was on sale.  I could get him that.  And I wanted to get something encouraging for Rory.  He has had a lot of stress lately, the kind that comes with being ... View Post

It's Memorial Day Weekend.   The television, radio, stores, & social media are flooded with reminders.   The BBQ's are all but fired up, and it won't be long and the celebratory photos will make their way onto facebook.   MY "exciting" plans involve weeding the backyard and planting a few flowers around the patio, and then perhaps to sit back in my chair and enjoy the beauty of the rosebush Dad & I planted about 14 years ago.  Dad loved rosebushes. But I can't start enjoying the Memorial Day weekend without thinking of three of my favorite veterans, and closest of friends.  I'd love to tell you about them!  Why?  Because they have been significant people in my life, who the very thought of makes me laugh out loud.   And, well, because I think they are pretty cool, and I think you ... View Post

I went to bed wondering if I should get up and watch the documentary on Kermit Gosnell, the "doctor" in Pennsylvania who was convicted of killing three babies who were born alive during abortion procedures. Yes, I said it.  He KILLED them.  Finally, unable to sleep, I got up and decided to watch it.  Now?  I'm going to cry myself to sleep. The tragedy of my own daughter dying because of a very severe and rare birth defect, and our choice to subsequently donate her body to the Neonatology Museum at Loma Linda Medical University Center, will never be an "old" story to me.  She is my daughter. And on my "bucket list" of things I want to do, is a trip back out to California where she is, because you see, it's been 8 years since I saw her.  I'm saving so that I can make a quick trip out ... View Post

On most days, I am a fairly cheerful person.  My glass is, the majority of times, at least half full. But I AM human, and I DO feel emotion.  I get angry.  I feel sad.  I get disgusted and impatient and annoyed.  Just like everyone else. In only the past few days, I have exchanged texts with a group of people praying for a young 17-year-old man getting a 2nd liver transplant in an attempt to save his life.  In between those texts, I ran up and down the stairs at work, to check on a friend, who was bedside as her mother was passing away.  I have gotten mugged and had money stolen from my bank account.  I have received news that another friend's mother has just been diagnosed with breast cancer, and learned that someone else I love will have surgery tomorrow to diagnose and stage their ... View Post

As I sit here tonight listening to the rain fall, I can't help but think back to 23 years ago this evening.  My heart was breaking, I felt more alone than I have ever felt in my life.  Silently as we made the 150-mile road trip through the California desert en route to Loma Linda Hospital to give birth to my daughter, knowing that she would die, I cried out to God like I had never cried out to Him before, or have ever since. Why?  Why MY daughter?  WHY ME?  Why is this happening to me?  Why are you taking her away from me?  Why God???!!!!! There's not much choice of music on the car radio when you're driving in the middle of nowhere. That's when I heard this song for the first time, and I knew, even though the author of it was not singing about MY situation, God was singing to ME ... View Post

My sister and I took turns spending time alone with Dad while he lay in his bed, having just been admitted into home hospice.  It was summer, the windows were open, and Dad would often comment about the familiar noises of construction going on at the elementary school next to the house.  In his confusion, he thought it was the MacLean Brothers Construction Company he worked for many years ago.  When Dad wasn't paying attention to the noises coming in through the window, he was tapping his foot to the Cape Breton fiddle tunes of Natalie MacMaster on the CD player.  He tapped his foot to the music until not long before he drew his last breath. But now and then, Dad would stare into space.  And sometimes, his facial expressions would leave me wondering what was going on, because he looked as ... View Post

It was a cute little place.  I wasn't crazy about the small porch, but a walk around to the back proved it to be a friendly little neighborhood, and I loved the deck.  A short-haired woman opened her sliding glass door, peeked her head out and said, "Buy it!!!   I make great java!!  Do you have any kids?"  I came around front and we talked for a few minutes.  Her porch was bigger than mine.  She makes good java.  Hmmm......... About a month later, my kids & I moved in.  That's when Michele would ask the question - the one that would forever define who she was to me and to so many others.  During one of our trips carrying boxes in, she came out with a cup of coffee and asked, "What can I do?"  And she meant it.  Soon another neighbor was at the door.  That was Billy.  He was my oldest ... View Post