There isn't a day that goes by I don't know of something I'd just love to write about. The shifts in what I like to refer to as my "school shoes and scrubs" at the hospital definitely give me the most material with which to work. Often, especially lately though, I come home and my mind just goes blank. Over the past year I haven't decided if that's because I'm simply too exhausted after a 12-hour shift, or I'm just getting better at keeping my mouth shut (or in this case, my laptop). Maybe I worry that what I'd love to get out of my head, off of my heart, or off of my CHEST just might offend someone. Maybe what I think is just irrelevant or inappropriate - even if it IS true. Maybe as a Christian I'm worried about offending those who aren't because I'm supposed to live ... View Post
The eye doctor and the Eye Doctor
Readers. They come in packages of four at my favorite store for $9.99. My first pair was 1.0 strength. I bought them after my friend Jean at work pointed out that I was unknowingly squinting while on the computer. I didn't believe her because I'd never worn glasses in my life, so I began paying attention to myself, and sure enough - the day I couldn't read a tiny little bottle at work in the middle of doing a procedure at work in the ICU, the physician told me to put on my glasses. Glasses? I don't wear glasses. I've never worn glasses. Guess what. That night? I stopped at TJ Max and bought a four-pack. That was the year I turned 50. Now I'm 56 and have graduated from 1.0 all the way up to 3.0, and am now on the verge of not finding the next strength in the ... View Post
Grace Defined
Every month I sit at the kitchen table, pay my bills, and divvy up my cash into envelopes - each for something different. It's the "envelope system" created by Dave Ramsey in his Financial Peace University program. $200 for groceries, $120 for gas, $70 for hair, $50 for gifts, and the list goes on. When the envelope is empty - that's it. All gone. No more. Now, I must wait until I earn some more. This morning, however, I was putting that cash into the envelopes and began thinking about a challenging question someone posed to me a couple of years ago. Insisting that I didn't understand what grace was, they asked me to define it. "Getting something I don't deserve" wasn't a satisfying enough answer for that individual, and since that time I have thought about the ... View Post
It’s Not About Me
She walked into the room and directly to the bedside of my patient. She made eye contact, smiled, made sure the blanket was covering his shoulders. She told him she was going to be his night shift nurse, and reassured him that she would take good care of him. She winked at him and gently touched his hand. Then, the nurse taking over for me walked over to the corner of the room where our patient's wife sat. She was crying, scared, anxious, had not gotten much rest, and had just made the most difficult decision in her life. She had signed her husband onto hospice. The nurse got down on her knees on the floor in front of our patient's wife. I'll never forget it. She knelt on that filthy ICU floor, because at that moment the most important people in the world were her ... View Post
Removing My Badge
I want to tell you a story. It's a story about my friend - my MICUBFFAW, and how she influenced me, and my patient care. Several years ago our unit manager assigned each Registered Nurse a "Medical Intensive Care Unit Best Friend Forever At Work." My particular MICUBFFAW and I just happen to still work on our floor, and I still tease her, "Hey - MICUBFFAW!" One day, I heard a story about my MICUBFFAW, and I heard it from a patient's wife. I can't recall the details of this patient's illness or the circumstances surrounding their hospitalization. But I remember the patient, I remember that he suffered from dementia, and I remember that his darling wife had the neatest Scottish accent ever. She visited us several days after her husband's discharge and brought home made ... View Post
Hey God – Move Over!
Getting my grandson to sit still on my lap and snuggle him is one of my favorite things to do these days. Owen is growing so quickly, becoming independent, crawling around and getting into all sorts of things. Having raised two of my own, I'm keenly aware of the need to seize every one of these snuggling opportunities I can because, as they say - TIME flies! Equally enjoyable are the moments I get to spend with Lyla on my lap, tickling her toes and telling make-believe stories. This morning, it was a traditional family song passed down three generations that I was singing for Owen while bouncing him on my knee when Lyla insisted Owen "move over" so she could also sit on my lap. "Move over!" she kept telling her brother. "Move over!" Bouncing them both on my knees over and over ... View Post
Single Mom Epic Urinal FAIL!
I've told this story at least five times in the past month or so, and finally decided it just needed to be a blog if for no other reason than to just make someone laugh today. And as an added bonus - so my sons won't forget it. We all need laughs to pass down generation to generation. So Rory and Ian - here you go! When you are a single mom and have your toddler sons around the clock 365 days a year, they kinda just do everything with you, including joining you in the bathroom stall in the ladies' room. It never seemed odd to them - it was just what we did. Take turns using the toilet, washing our hands. It was perfectly normal! It never occurred to me that the first trip into the men's bathroom without mom would be confusing. After all, they used the bathroom at ... View Post
Farewell, Antigonish!
(Little Thing #144/365): It's my last night here in Antigonish, Nova Scotia. All week long I've been taking notes, coming back to my room and doing some studying for work back home, but also taking some time to write down things I don't want to forget. Things I want my sons to know, to remember, to pass on. Some are stories, a few little songs or riddles, a couple of witty sayings we've laughed about all week - But ALL of it history. It's almost midnight. I've got to be up in just a few short hours, but I don't dare fall asleep before writing this down somewhere other than on my phone as notes. I'm full of emotion tonight. That's when my thoughts get recorded most accurately. So here's tonight's attempt. Childhood summers in Nova Scotia, three-day drives playing games in ... View Post