Several times I have sat and attempted to articulate in writing, even a small amount of what I have been able to process since returning home from the Passion Conference in Atlanta, Georgia. Each time I tried to write about my experience on the prayer team, however, I was unable.
I love to pray, but I also love being around the young people, holding doors open for them and watching them absorb a few days’ worth of the best and most anointed teachings they may ever have the opportunity to hear. I enjoy watching them lean in to learn all that they can, have their minds renewed, their hearts transformed, and experience Jesus like never before – many for the very first time. This year, however, I had the opportunity to pray for them from behind the scenes on the intercessory prayer team. in a small quiet room, with others from all over the country. I knew it would be powerful to pray over each of their seats, to intercede for them while they were attending the conference, and many of them being spiritually attacked. I knew it would be sacred to be on the team to pray for very specific prayers from the various leaders and teachers involved in the conference. I also expected it would be physically easier for me than previous years. And, I knew that task would, no doubt, come with spiritual attacks. But I had no idea that those attacks would begin WEEKS prior to my departure, and continue right up until the very moment I stepped foot on the airplane.
Last night I sat, wanting so badly to write, but no words seemed to be able to make it from my heart into writing. Nothing. It was there. I just had no words to express it. You see, when I arrived home after spending three days and nights praying, it was a huge let down. I came back to reality, back to this temporary world we live in, in this temporary body with all of its aches and pains, and jumped right back into my daily routines. I had, in a very real spiritual sense, left the throne room of God, and came back into this evil world, to all of its terrorist attacks, racism, and hate. And let’s face it, unless you are on vacation, praying in three-hour shifts, and sleeping in between them, waking only for the purpose of praying again – just doesn’t happen in every day life. The reality of this world we live in really took its toll on me for a couple of days. To say I wasn’t myself would not do how I felt, justice. I was sad and disgusted with everything and everyone.
I’m pretty good at shaking things off though. It’s just how I’m wired. After a couple of days, I was back into the swing of my every day life, laughing, and being myself. But I still was unable to process where I had been.
Last night, I sat in my chair and attempted to write. Finally unable to even begin the first paragraph, I knew the Lord just wanted me to rest. So I did. Not long after I had been in bed, I received a text message from a close friend that she is very sick, and to please pray. I promised, and I prayed. Not long after I had fallen asleep, I received another text message from a friend in Seattle, asking that I please pray for a newborn named Gabe, unexpectedly born with a heart defect, being flown emergently to a larger hospital. Again, I promised to pray, and I prayed.
At 1 a.m., I awoke thinking of both my friend Sarah and baby Gabe. I prayed. At 3 a.m., I awoke again thinking of Sarah and baby Gabe. I prayed. At 4:30, I awoke again thinking of Sarah and Gabe. I prayed. And it finally donned on me what to write. Fully awake now, I made some coffee and sat in my chair from where all of my blog entries originate, and I asked God for the words.
I remembered immediately one night when I was a little girl, afraid because my dad was in the hospital very, very sick, and they couldn’t figure out what was wrong with him. I was so afraid my dad was going to die that I laid sideways in my bed, put my feet on the wall to keep myself awake, and I prayed all night long. When my mother awoke me for school the next morning, I had not slept a wink. When my dad’s health improved enough to come home, I was convinced that it was because God heard MY prayer. I have believed that my entire life, and to this day, I still do.
I just had no idea at that young age, that I had actually BEEN to the very throne room of God! I had no idea that going straight to God without asking for the intercession of all of his friends and family was unnecessary. I was unaware of any scriptures such as these,
“For there is ONE God and ONE mediator between God and mankind, the man Christ Jesus.” 1 Timothy 2:5
“And so, dear brothers and sisters, we can boldly enter heaven’s Most Holy Place because of the blood of Jesus.” Hebrews 10:19
“Therefore He is able, once and forever, to save those who come to God through HIM. He lives forever to intercede with God on their behalf.” Hebrews 7:25
“Let us go to the sanctuary of the LORD; let us worship at the footstool of his throne.” Psalm 132:7
You see, BECAUSE of what Jesus did on the Cross, when He spoke some of His last words, “IT IS FINISHED!” (John 19:30), you and I CAN walk boldly, as it says in Hebrews, right into the throne room of God Himself! (Try doing that at the White House!) These three words were PACKED with meaning. Not only was Christ’s earthly life finished – So was His suffering and dying – The payment for sin and the redemption of the world had been achieved! His final act of obedience was complete and SCRIPTURES HAD BEEN FULFILLED!
Friends, we now have the opportunity, the ability, the invitation, the honor, the privilege of walking boldly into the throne room of God because of Jesus’ intercession for us. We need not go through anyone else – Only Jesus.
John 14:13-14 says, “And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. You may ask me for anything in MY name, and I will do it.”
Not only does it make perfect sense to me now, that after spending three days in the throne room of God, only to return to this sin-filled, disgustingly evil world, where good is called evil, and evil is called good, that being “down” would be an expected way to feel…. I now believe I fully grasp what a gift we have, and what an absolute honor and privilege it is to be able to pray, from anywhere, at anytime, for any reason. Revelation 8:4 says that our prayers rise like incense up to God. That means that wherever you are – Whether it’s from your bed, from the bathroom at your workplace, whether you are driving in your car, or you just wake up in the middle of the night – When you draw near to God with your prayers, you are entering his throne room, and He is drawing near to you!
The spiritual attacks also make perfect sense to me now. What a threat our prayers are to the enemy! No wonder he tries to distract us – Most often for me, by reminding me of my OWN needs, aches, pains, and worries, in an attempt to STOP me from praying for others!
I am praying this morning that the next time you close your eyes, and take your thankfulness, your worries, your concerns, and your requests to the Lord, that you grasp as fully as we are able to in this life, just where you truly are in that moment.