I wish I could tell you that when I look in the mirror, I see myself how God sees me. But on most days, I don’t – and today was no different. I don’t have it all together. My life is not perfect. I’m certainly about as far from perfect as one can get. And, on days like this one, I don’t feel very beautiful and I don’t live as if I believe what God says about me.
On days like today, I look in the mirror and here is what I think and see:
I’m still overweight. How did this ever happen? How did I get this big? How did I get this old-looking? My hair is grey. My neck is wrinkled. My pants are too tight (now I’m angry with myself). Don’t I care about myself anymore? How will anyone ever love me looking like this? I’m unloveable.
My back hurts. I walk with a limp. (How very unattractive.) My skin is ugly. I must cover it up with make-up.
I’ve screwed up friendships. Earlier this year, I lost two. They told me what a lousy, unloveable person and friend I am, and you know what? Deep down inside of me, even though I know it’s not how God thinks of me – I still believe the things that they said. I still haven’t forgiven myself. I still don’t think I deserve to be forgiven. I have also acted like a spoiled brat and ruined other friendships. I still feel unforgiven, and have begun to think it’s how God thinks of me. What if after God forgives me, He continues to punish me, or worse yet – doesn’t love me nearly as much as He may have before?
I have made poor choices, and though the Scriptures tell me I’m forgiven, the consequences of them still haunt me and tempt me to believe I’m condemned.
I’m a loser. I’m unloveable. I’m ugly. I’m fat. I’m disgusting. I’m not fun. I’m boring. I’m stupid. I’m self-centered.
And on and on…….
Oh!!! But, I”m really good at reminding everyone ELSE how God sees them. And I’m even better at forgetting that it’s actually how God sees ME, too!
So, today, I’m writing this to me, but I’m writing it for you too, because just maybe I’m not the only one who needs to actually write down TRUTHS that God speaks about US. Maybe I’m not the only one who needs to be reminded of my identity in Christ.
Scripture is clear. For those who have put their trust in Christ (alone), He sees us as His children (John 1:12). I am accepted (Romans 15:7). I am united with the Lord and one with Him in spirit (Romans 6:6). I am chosen; a royal priesthood (1 Peter 2:9). He chose me when He planned creation (Ephesians 1:11-12). I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). He offers me more than my earthly father ever could (Matthew 5:48). God loves me with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3). His thoughts toward me are as countless as the sand on the seashore (Psalms 139:17-18). God takes great delight in me, and rejoices over me with singing (Zephaniah 3:17). I am His treasured possession (Exodus 19:5).
God is my greatest encourager (2 Thessalonians 2:16-17). If I delight myself in Him, He will give me the desires of my heart (Psalm 37:4), for it is God who gave me those desires (Philippians 2:13). God is my Father who comforts me in all my troubles (2 Corinthians 1:3-4). He is close to me when I am broken hearted (Psalm 34:18). As a shepherd carries a lamb, He carries me close to His heart (Isaiah 40:11). One day He will wipe away all the tears from my eyes, and remove all of the pain I have suffered on earth (Revelation 21:3-4). God loves me even as He loves His Son, Jesus (John 17:23). He is for me, not against me (Romans 8:31). He is not counting my sins (2 Corinthians 5:18-19). In fact, He removes my sins as far as the east is from the west (Psalm 103:12). Nothing will ever separate His love from me (Romans 8:38-39).
I once purchased a small hand-held mirror for someone’s purse to remind them of how God sees them. Perhaps I need to keep one in my purse as well. And most importantly – I need to keep myself swimming in God’s Word, reading over and over, and reminding myself again and again of the TRUTHS He says about me, and not the lies that I am tempted to start believing myself…..