Readers. They come in packages of four at my favorite store for $9.99. My first pair was 1.0 strength. I bought them after my friend Jean at work pointed out that I was unknowingly squinting while on the computer. I didn’t believe her because I’d never worn glasses in my life, so I began paying attention to myself, and sure enough – the day I couldn’t read a tiny little bottle at work in the middle of doing a procedure at work in the ICU, the physician told me to put on my glasses.
Glasses? I don’t wear glasses. I’ve never worn glasses.
Guess what. That night? I stopped at TJ Max and bought a four-pack.
That was the year I turned 50. Now I’m 56 and have graduated from 1.0 all the way up to 3.0, and am now on the verge of not finding the next strength in the back of that favorite store of mine. In fact, just a few hours from now I have an appointment with the ophthalmologist.
While I am certain the aging process has played a role, I am even more convinced that these little phones that every single one of us have become so terribly, embarrassingly dependent on have sped up the process of blurring every single thing I try to read. When I’m on my phone too much during the day, my eyes burn and hurt, and my vision is not great at night.
You know what? The deterioration of my sight because I spend too much time on my cell phone isn’t that much different than my inability to see circumstances in my life clearly when I get too busy either.
My days this summer have been so filled. Working two jobs, constantly on the move it seems, and trying to maintain my home, its responsibilities, and just keep up with laundry, has left me little time to maintain friendships or do much in terms of being entertained or just relaxing and enjoying the people I love to spend time with. In fact – I gave away my patio furniture because I don’t have time to sit out and enjoy it. I bought one pot of flowers and killed them because – you guessed it! No time to water them!
I knew I was getting too busy, and I knew I was on the verge of having one of my personal self-pity party “melt downs” this past Sunday when going into a gas station I tripped and just wiped out, falling down and cutting up my knee and shoulder. I felt like an idiot when someone had to help me get up. (Why do we feel like idiots when we fall?)
But after that fall, I knew. I just knew it was time to slow down. Take a deep breath.
And then – a couple of “hiccups” if you will…….
They happen. To everybody.
I finally just had to take a step back. Breathe. Say no to several things. And to people.
Get alone with God. (A “shut up and LISTEN” moment for me)
I don’t have any answers yet; however, I can certainly SEE a little clearer.
A little less time on the phone, a little more practice in using my “no” muscle, and a lot more time being alone with God – quiet and listening.
I’m looking forward to clearer vision – both from less time on the phone and from getting used to using my no muscle. Oh yes, and there’s my eye doc appointment shortly too.
I certainly do need my physical sight.
But what I’m mostly looking forward to is some intentional TIME alone, being still and knowing He is God, and I am not! I need the sight that HE gives me more than anything I’m going to read on my phone.
And now – Off to see the eye doctor, and the Eye Doctor……