It’s almost 10 p.m., my 3rd load of laundry is in the wash, and my weeks’ worth of scrubs are hanging on my new clothesline thingy in the garage so I can avoid making my little condo too heated up on this sweet summer night. My shoes are out on the porch with their tongues hanging out to dry after having walked through 18 different houses and nursing homes this week. My car’s been cleaned out, my rolling suitcase cleaned up and sorted out, my trunk reorganized (sort of), my box of binders transferred from the back seat “office,” to my desk in the basement for updates and purging before Tuesday, and my next week’s “hopeful” schedule all planned out. I’m currently sitting with my foot in an Epsom salts soak because the pedicure I was so looking forward to on Monday night went bad and now I have what feels like an ingrown toe nail, but …. how could it be?
I have more closely monitored the bowel movements of 18 people this week than I have my own, replaced bandages for people who aren’t allowed to because they aren’t nurses (but have several children), tied shoes for those who can’t reach their feet (sometimes I can’t reach mine), changed beds (dirty beds, with people in them), investigated a missing mattress, found said missing mattress in a big pile of other mattresses that are also probably “missing”, been accused of not knowing how to use a scale, (Um, I know how to use them – I just avoid them), been pooped on (not my poop), fell up a stair, (I’m talented, what can I say?), argued with someone that my name is NOT Darlene (and finally gave up cuz I was not winning that argument), had someone bite a hole right through my stethoscope, been told I don’t know how to communicate, and had the cashier at Lowe’s tell me he didn’t believe that I was a veteran and wanted to see my ID.
If you’d have told me 35 years ago that hanging a week’s worth of scrubs on the new clothesline thingy on a Friday evening would be the most exciting night of my week, I would never have believed it, but here I am! Foot in Epsom salts, the sounds of 4th of July fireworks going off in the distance, and I’ll be in bed before 11 p.m. So glad this week has come to an end.
I love being a nurse, but I sure hope nobody needs me tomorrow, cuz people…. This Darlene is just tuckered the heck out…