The Hand Shake

For about the past year, I’ve been seriously thinking about moving one week, and half seriously the next week.  Then, I stop thinking about it for a month, then my sister sends me a link to a cute condo and I start half seriously looking again.  It’s been fun some weeks, but stressful others.

Meanwhile, I’ve been purging, and cleaning, and sorting, and purging some more so that when the day comes and I decide to relocate, I can both sell and move quickly.  Lo and behold, I fell in love with a darling little condo that was ready to be moved into, and so listing mine immediately was easy peezy!  Practically, all I had to do was make my bed and vacuum.  I was ready.

I sold my home of 22 years in 48 hours and began to fill boxes.  Meanwhile, I was negotiating back and forth with the owners of that darling condo, who seemed honest and kind, but last minute left me hanging for a week waiting on the financial statements from their association.   Then late last night they sent me a text message, “We received a higher offer.  Sorry, and good luck.”

I think I was more disappointed in them, than I was in my not getting that condo.  I realize it wasn’t meant to be, and I certainly didn’t lose any sleep over that.  I’m looking at another condo this morning, but I am mostly just disappointed in these people and their lack of integrity and honesty.  But that’s pretty common nowadays, isn’t it?

Last night I was lying in bed remembering a story my friend Kathy told me.  She and her husband were basically doing the same thing – purging, purging, looking, and looking.  They knew exactly where they wanted to move, and after about a year searching for a new home, found a FOR SALE BY OWNER in the neighborhood they knew they wanted to retire in.  They bravely walked together to the door, knocked, and the elderly gentleman who lived there took them for a tour of his home of many years.  On the spot, Kathy’s husband Mike made an offer that the man accepted, and wrote a check for an earnest money deposit, and they shook hands.

They shook hands!!  No one shakes hands nowadays, especially with COVID!

Over the course of the following week as Kathy and Mike prepared to list their current home, apparently someone stopped over to see that very same FOR SALE BY OWNER, who had a real estate agent with them.  They did the same thing – knocked at the door, and wanted a tour.  The owner of the home told him he had accepted an offer.  When the real estate agent asked if they had signed a purchase agreement yet, the man said no, so on the spot they offered him $15,000 more, and reassured him that he was under no obligation to accept Mike and Kathy’s previous offer since they had not signed any legal contract yet…

“We shook hands,” the owner of the home said.

“It doesn’t matter,” said the real estate agent.  “There is no signed legal contract or purchase agreement.  You can tell them you received a higher offer.”

“Yes, there most certainly is a contract,” said the man.  “We shook hands.”  And he closed the door.

I thought a lot about my own Dad last night as I remembered this story Kathy told me.  My Dad was an honest, hard-working, hand-shaking man.  His hand shake meant something, just like this gentleman’s did.  He taught my sons how to shake hands too – I remember him doing so, because I remember them being awfully little, but always shaking the hands of older gentlemen.  It made me proud of them.  And I am certain that my Dad’s, and this man’s INTEGRITY and HONESTY paid off big time not only here, but will do so in eternity as well.

COVID or no COVID…   Be the kind of person whose handshake means something.   And teach it to your sons and daughters to be men and women of integrity and honesty.   It’s one of the best gifts you’ll ever give your children, and it won’t cost you a doggone thing.  (They DO watch us).

To Rory & Ian – Every day I pray that you grow up to be so much like your Papa, and that you never forget the seemingly small, but immensely powerful lessons he taught you…   like the value of your word, and your handshake.

“Better the poor whose walk is blameless than the rich whose ways are perverse.”  Proverbs 28:6

FACTS ABOUT HANDSHAKES

“The handshake is one of the highest forms of symbolic currency with the power to unite, divide, seal deals, and broker peace. It is a simple gesture that can be more informative to people than a whole host of grand speeches.”  Unknown author